Feelings
Alec’s POV
Slowly pushing open the door to my new apartment, I took a deep breath. I stepped inside and was immediately struck by how small and cramped everything looked. The kitchen was barely bigger than a closet and the living room was crowded with a couch, coffee table, and TV stand that barely fit in the space. I hated the place but it was the only apartment I could find on short notice, which was not too far away from the college campus.
I dropped my duffel bag on the floor and headed towards the bedroom. I shook my head when I saw that it was just as cramped as the rest of the apartment, with a twin size bed taking up most of the room. There was a desk squeezed into the corner and a small window that overlooked the quiet street below. That was the only good thing about the apartment. It was in a quiet place.
I sighed and flopped down on the bed. I was not used to living in such a small spaces and couldn’t help but feel a little overwhelmed. But I reminded myself that it was just temporary and I’d find a better place soon.
After Lynn had found me with Carina, Lynn had sent her friends Kari and Jen to threaten me. Lynn was thinking of reporting me to the new manager who had replaced my mother’s friend for the things I had done when I just moved to the apartment like playing loud music at all times, organizing parties with drugs etc. she was going to claim I was still making her life hard if I didn’t leave the apartment. Not only that but Jessie had also made her own reports and the manager warned me. I could have defended myself and proved them all wrong but I didn’t want drama. That’s why I had opted to vacate the building and find a new apartment.
As I started to unpack my belongings, I couldn’t help but feel a little excited about having an apartment I didn’t have to share. Even though that apartment wasn’t exactly what I had been hoping for, I knew I’d be happier with all the privacy. There was no one to stop me from having parties every day if I wanted.
Thinking of freedom reminded me of Lynn and I felt sad. I went and sat at a table in the kitchen area, staring at the plastic bottle of water in front of me. I couldn’t believe what had just happened.
Just that morning, I had woken up feeling better than the past few days. I was ready to go and look for Lynn to make her see my side of things.
On the day Jessie kissed me, I had been caught off guard and had frozen in shock for a while before pushing her off. By the time I did, it was too late. Lynn had already stormed off, leaving me with that snake. Before I could get to Lynn, she had found me talking to another woman at my doorway, a woman I had history with. Was there no end to this mess?
I couldn’t believe that I had lost my girlfriend because of two foolish girls. I had been asking Carina to leave me alone when Lynn reached the landing and saw us. She turned on her heel and left immediately. I went after her but she was too fast. I couldn’t believe that two coincidences had ruined everything I had spent so much time building. It had taken long for me to convince Lynn that she could trust me.
I knew that I had to do something to try and fix things, but I wasn’t sure if it was even possible. I just hoped that my girlfriend would be willing to listen and give me another chance. I stood up and went to get my phone. I dialed her number and she refused to pick up. I tried to put myself in her shoes, but concluded she was still being unreasonable. She had to know what kind of people carina and Jessie were. It hurt me that she believed them instead of me.
Maybe it was better for us to be apart. If she couldn’t trust me, there was no point in us having a relationship. This was never going to stop, and I had had enough of it. Grabbing my wallet, I locked the front door and left. I was done with Lynn and her trust issues. The fact that she couldn’t even give me a listening ear spoke volumes about what she thought of me. This was never going to work. I couldn’t spend my life moping around because of someone who didn’t care to listen to me. I had to move on. If relationships were all like this, I was going to have to start avoiding them. I had been doing well enough before Lynn anyway.
It was a Saturday night, Herschel’s club was crowded and loud. It had been a while since I had been there. I realized how much I had missed it. I was surrounded by my dear friends, all of whom were trying to pick up girls and bragging about their latest conquests.
But I was feeling different that night. As I watched my friends flirt and dance with different women, I felt a sense of emptiness wash over me. I’d always enjoyed the thrill of the chase, the rush of adrenaline that came with picking up a new girl. But tonight, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it for some reason.NôvelDrama.Org holds © this.
I tried to shake off the feeling, chugging down another beer and joining in on the conversation. But, I couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that I was just going through the motions, that I was no longer enjoying this lifestyle. I no longer wanted to be in a club looking out for the next random girl to bed. I wanted something more real than that. I wanted to hit a club with my girlfriend and have fun with her, or just have fun with friends. As the night wore on, I found myself drifting away from my friends. I just wanted to have a peaceful evening, without all the jokes and loudness.
Suddenly, I made a decision. I stood up, threw some money on the bar, and walked out of the club. As I walked home, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief wash over me. I had finally decided that he was done with the player lifestyle, and was ready to look for someone to love. I had to first find a way of getting rid of my feelings for Lynn Harris.